News from the future! Last weapons manufacturer leaves the business

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In a bold move this week, Python, the world’s last weapons manufacturer, announced that it will be leaving the business for the far more lucrative and sustainable pyrotechnics industry. According to CEO Guy Flashbang, the decision was made last week at the company’s Annual General Meeting. “We are really excited about this new phase and are looking forward to putting our expertise to good use for peace celebrations all over the world.”

For many in the business community, this decision comes as no surprise. The arms industry has been in turmoil over the last decade given the steep decline in armed conflict following the 2022 Paris Peace talks, which outlined a comprehensive plan for world peace and received universal approval.

“The 2022 peace plan fundamentally shifted this industry, and Python’s decision to change course is just the last consequence of the global agreement and resulting decrease in demand,” says industry expert, Tracey Trigger. “With most weapons already retired, melted down and recycled for other uses, and with Python leaving the industry, it will be virtually impossible to return to a world full of armed conflict because there are no companies producing weapons anymore.”

While the arms industry has taken a hit, other businesses are booming and economies thriving since the peace plan was signed. Capital has shifted away from the military-industrial complex resulting in increased resources and investments in infrastructure and public services. Most notable, however, is the rapid rise of the friendship bracelet industry, which has seen year-on-year growth of 50-75 per cent.

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